RE: To Unsubscribe... ;-)

["Wes Woods" <woods@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Title: Message

This just came to my attention this AM. Since someone just asked how to do this I thought you all might enjoy it.

 

No offense meant to the person who just asked.

 

To wit:

 

Here is how to stop receiving Listserv mail...

 

First, ask your Internet Provider to mail you an Unsubscribing Kit.

 

Then follow these directions: 

 

The kit will most likely be the standard no-fault type. Depending on 

requirements, System A and/or System B can be used. When operating 

System A, depress lever and a plastic dalkron unsubscriber will be 

dispensed through the slot immediately underneath. When you have 

fastened the adhesive lip, attach connection marked by the large "X" 

outlet hose. Twist the silver- coloured ring one inch below the 

connection point until you feel it lock.

 

The kit is now ready for use. The Cin-Eliminator is activated by the 

small switch on the lip. When securing, twist the ring back to its 

initial condition, so that the two orange lines meet. Disconnect.

 

Place the dalkron unsubscriber in the vacuum receptacle to the rear.

Activate by pressing the blue button. The controls for System B are

located on the opposite side. The red release switch places the Cin-

Eliminator into position; it can be adjusted manually up or down by

pressing the blue manual release button. The opening is self- adjusting.

To secure after use, press the green button, which simultaneously

activates the evaporator and returns the Cin-Eliminator to its storage

position.

 

You may log off if the green exit light is on over the evaporator . If the red

light is illuminated, one of the Cin-Eliminator requirements has not been

properly implemented. Press the "List Guy" call button on the right of the

evaporator . He will secure all facilities from his control panel.

 

To use the Auto-Unsub, first undress and place all your clothes in the

clothes rack. Put on the velcro slippers located in the cabinet 

immediately below. Enter the shower, taking the entire kit with you. On

the control panel to your upper right upon entering you will see a "Shower

seal" button. Press to activate. A green light will then be illuminated

immediately below. On the intensity knob, select the desired setting. Now

depress the Auto-Unsub activation lever. Bathe normally.

 

The Auto-Unsub will automatically go off after three minutes unless you

activate the "Manual off" override switch by flipping it up. When you are

ready to leave, press the blue "Shower seal" release button. The door will

open and you may leave. Please remove the velcro slippers and place

them in their container.

 

If you prefer the ultrasonic log-off mode, press the indicated blue button.

When the twin panels open, pull forward by rings A & B. The knob to the

left, just below the blue light, has three settings, low, medium or high. For

normal use, the medium setting is suggested. After these settings have

been made, you can activate the device by switching to the "ON" position

the clearly marked red switch. If during the unsubscribing operation, you

wish to change the settings, place the "manual off" override switch in the

"OFF" position. You may now make the change and repeat the cycle.

When the green exit light goes on, you may log off and have lunch. Please

close the door behind you.

 

[originally posted to the Serv-U support list; author unknown]

Happy Holidays!, fair winds and following seas.